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Jokes
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Jokes
Description:
A variety of different jokes to establish a humor or entertainment website
Rows:
10,999
Keywords:
jokes,humor,humour,comedy,funny,niche
Download:
jokes.gz
|
jokes.zip
|
jokes.sql
Preview
CREATE TABLE `Jokes` ( `JokeID` INTEGER, `JokeCategory` VARCHAR(255), `JokeName` VARCHAR(255), `Joke` TEXT ) TYPE=MyISAM; INSERT INTO `Jokes` VALUES (NULL, 'Animal Jokes', 'Vampire Bat', 'A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep. Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it. He told them to go away and let him get some sleep but they persisted until finally he gave in.\"OK, follow me\" he said and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him. Down through the valley they went, across a river and into a forest full of trees. Finally he slowed down and all the other bats excitedly milled around him. \"Now, do you see that tree over there?\" he asked. \"Yes, Yes, Yes!\" the bats all screamed in a frenzy. \"Good\" said the bat, \"Because I sure as hell didn\'t!\"'); INSERT INTO `Jokes` VALUES (NULL, 'Animal Jokes', 'Dog named Sex', 'Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him \"Rover\" or \"Spot\". I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog\'s license, I told the clerk that I would like a license for Sex. He said, \"I would like to have one too!\" Then I said, \"But she is a dog!\" He said he didn\'t care what she looked like. I said, \"You don\'t understand. ... I have had Sex since I was nine years old.\" He replied, \"You must have been quite a strong boy.\" When I decided to get married, I told the minister that I would like to have Sex at the wedding.He told me to wait until after the wedding was over. I said, \"But Sex has played a big part in my life and my whole world revolves around Sex.\" He said he didn\'t want to hear about my personal life and would not marry us in his church. I told him everyone would enjoy having Sex at the wedding. The next day we were married at the Justice of the Peace. My family was barred from the church from then on. When my wife and I went on our honeymoon, I took the dog with me. When we checked into the motel, I told the clerk that I wanted a room for me and my wife and a special room for Sex. He said that every room in the motel is a place for sex. I said, \"You don\'t understand. ... Sex keeps me awake at night.\" The clerk said, \"Me too!\" One day I entered Sex in a contest. But before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just looking around. I told h
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