Fortune

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17:30, Channel 5: The Bionic Dog (Action/Adventure)\n\tThe Bionic Dog drinks too much and kicks over the National\n\tRedwood Forest.\n\n7:30, Channel 8: The Bionic Dog (Action/Adventure)\n\tThe Bionic Dog gets a hormonal short-circuit and violates the\n\tMann Act with an interstate Greyhound bus.\n
2A critic is a man who creates nothing and thereby feels qualified to\njudge the work of creative men. There is logic in this; he is unbiased \n-- he hates all creative people equally.\n
3A celebrity is a person who is known for his well-knownness.\n
4\tA circus foreman was making the rounds inspecting the big top\nwhen a scrawny little man entered the tent and walked up to him. Are \nyou the foreman around here? he asked timidly. I'd like to join your\ncircus; I have what I think is a pretty good act.\n\tThe foreman nodded assent, whereupon the little man hurried over to\nthe main pole and rapidly climbed up to the very tip-top of the big top.\nDrawing a deep breath, he hurled himself off into the air and began flapping\nhis arms furiously. Amazingly, rather than plummeting to his death the little\nman began to fly all around the poles, lines, trapezes and other obstacles,\nperforming astounding feats of aerobatics which ended in a long power dive\nfrom the top of the tent, pulling up into a gentle feet-first landing beside\nthe foreman, who had been nonchalantly watching the whole time.\n\tWell, puffed the little man. What do you think?\n\tThat's all you do? answered the foreman scornfully. Bird\nimitations?\n
5A copy of the universe is not what is required of art; one of the damned\nthings is ample.\n\t\t-- Rebecca West\n
6A critic is a bundle of biases held loosely together by a sense of taste.\n\t\t-- Whitney Balliett\n
7A diva who specializes in risque arias is an off-coloratura soprano.\n
8A drama critic is a person who surprises a playwright by informing him\nwhat he meant.\n\t\t-- Wilson Mizner\n
9A fool-proof method for sculpting an elephant: first, get a huge block of\nmarble; then you chip away everything that doesn't look like an elephant.\n
10\tA hard-luck actor who appeared in one coloossal disaster after another\nfinally got a break, a broken leg to be exact. Someone pointed out that it's\nthe first time the poor fellow's been in the same cast for more than a week.\n